‘Basically how social events go for me:

1. Get invited – YAY! That sounds so fun! I’m so in. I can’t wait to see faces, and hear voices! I’m so excited!
2. Leading up – I don’t wanna go. I don’t wanna go. I don’t wanna go. Cause people and small talk and what about if I talk too much and look like a jerk? Or what if I don’t know what to say and don’t talk at all and people think I’m Snotty? What if I have something hanging out of my nose? What if I forget how to answer questions? I don’t even know what day it is. WHAT AM I GONNA WEAR????? Business casual makes no sense to me. That’s the dumbest dress code ever. I hatttttte this. [Stress shoves handfuls of chocolate chips into mouth quickly and repeatedly and without thought.] I’m so excited! I’m so excited. I’m so….scared.
3. Walking up – Oh my gosh. Please don’t act weird. Please be normal. Please be normal. Please be normal. I forgot deodorant. [sniff pitts] No I didn’t. I’m good, but still. Oh.my.actual.gosh.
4. Leaving – That was so much fun! What the heck was I so nervous about? Not one person cared about what I looked like, and connecting with people is amazing. I won’t freak out beforehand next time. I’m ridiculous.
5. That night – Stay awake going over every single conversation and that time I laughed weirder and harder than everyone else, and the one time I interrupted, and then they stopped talking and I stopped talking. And then started talking simultaneously. Praying they still like me, but honestly…not super sure.
6. The next morning – Get a text saying something like “it was so great to see you! We really need to hang out more.” Reply Yes!!! We really do.”

Repeat for all eternity.

Love,
Amy‘

I’ve never felt so understood. Thank you, Amy.

-Mike